Poultry Farm

Today I went to buy the form for the entrance test of a post graduate course in management. It’s called CAT. I think it stands for Common Aptitude Test… or something like that.
Now this CAT is a big deal in my country. A real big deal. It’s supposed to be the most difficult entrance examination to crack in the “whole wide world” owing to the intense competition because of the sheer number of people sitting for it. But competing with about a gazillion people every time you want entrance in some college is something all Indians get used to growing up.
Anyways, as I was standing in the line waiting for my turn to come, which took about 2 hours of standing by the way, several thoughts went through my mind.
I was asking myself if I am really fit for doing a management course.

Let’s see.

1. I was buying the form on the second last day before the deadline, with a good chance that the forms might actually run out.
Implies -> Not very responsible.

Imagine me going on to become the CEO of some company.

Second-in-Command: Boss, I think its time for us to file for bankruptcy. I think we can still save our ass and get out of this mess.
Me: Hmmm. When’s the last date? Oh, there’s plenty of time. You worry too much!

2. I should have been at the place where the forms were being sold really early. To avoid the rush. In fact, I even woke up at 6:30 today (which is a BIG deal for me), thinking that I’d be there by around 8:15 or so. And I would have, had I not switched on the frickin’ Idiot Box at 6:30 in the morning and started watching the same episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. which I saw last night before sleeping.
Implies -> Not good at managing time.

Second-in-command: Let’s go boss. The shareholders are waiting at the AGM. And we have to meet the president soon after.
Me: Sshhhh…. Grab a chair man. You just came at the right moment. I am watching Rocky-10. Stallone is about to kick the other guy’s ass in the World Octagenarian Heavyweight Championship.

Second-in-command: But sir, the president, the shareholders !!!
Me: Dude!!! Did you not hear me? ROCKY-10 !!!

3. I haven’t yet started studying for this CAT thing. And it’s just 3 months away. I think…
Implies - >Doesn’t have a grip on Status Quo.

Second-in-command: Sir, the SSCMEE team is here.
Me: The who???

Second-in-command: Sir, the audit team. To give us the SSCMEE security rating.
Me: The What?

Second-in-command: Sir, don’t you remember? You signed the proposal last week.
Me: Wait a minute? When did THAT happen?


Now I don’t know what qualities are looked for in a typical “”MBA-Material”” kinda guy, but I am sure “Irresponsible”, “Bad manager of time” and “Not having a grip on situation” are not one of them.

I think I should open a poultry farm or something. I mean how difficult can it be making/selling eggs. Just leave a couple of hens with a horny rooster and let nature do the rest.

Right???

How I got inspired, made a plan, and got a life

I keep having this sinking feeling every now and then that i am just wasting
away my life. Everyone around me seems to have a plan. Some are studying
(for CAT, for GRE, for GMAT), some are changing jobs, some are getting to go
onsite and earn dollars. In short, everyone seems to be doing something or
preparing for something. They have "A Plan". And then there is yours tru'ly.
The only planning i seem to be doing is to decide where to eat my dinner
tonight, which movie to watch when i get back home and whether to watch the
Nth re-run of F.R.I.E.N.D.S (what's with the dots? so difficult to type!!)
on Star World or "The fabulous life of the rich and famous" on VH1.

Hmm... Not good. Not good at all.

So then i decided, on one fine morning, to come up with my
own "Plan". Normally, i wouldn't put a personal thing like that on this
blog, but when i finished making the plan and read it, i was so damn sure i
wasn't going to follow even a single part of it, that i burst out laughing
at my own optimism.


The Plan

1. Finances - Start keeping strict track of finances. Avoid splurging. Do
NOT go anywhere near a supermarket for at least a month. Hide Credit
Card somewhere. Kick room-mate whenever he says "Ja, jee le apni zindagi".

2. Food - Only veg food (eggs are veg). One month trial basis. Non-veg only
when out with friends. "Naughty Angels Cafe" does not count as outing. Cut
down on junk food. Stay away from McDonalds and KFC.

3. Work - Try... just try to come to work on time every day (Office starts
at 9:30 by the way). Don't leave early unless something important
comes up (going home and watching "Seinfeld" does NOT count as "something
important") . Don't chill-out at office.

4. Learning - Start reading more. Finish at least one book every week. Start
reading more mags ( "Top Gear" does not count. Neither does
"Digit"). And for god's sake start the MCAD preparation.

5. Television - CUT DOWN. Watch more news. Do not watch "Fabulous life of
the rich and famous" on VH1 and "MTV Cribs" anymore.

6. Body - Sleep earlier everyday. By around 12. Wake up early. Around 7
should be fine. Start doing push-ups everyday. And any other exercise which
can be done indoors. Bring out the skipping rope.

7. Guitar - Practice for at least half an hour everyday. Be religious about
it.

8. Laptop - Use it for something better than playing games (Counter-Strike
is NOT a game. It is a tried and tested method for stress-relief).
Un-install Doom3. start readin tech books on it.

9. Movies - Not more than 5 per week ( 2 on weekdays, 3 on weekends). Not
more than 1 in theatre per week. Do NOT watch Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna.

10. Mind - Start writing more. Write something every night before going to
bed. Try and add something to the blog at least once a week.



As i said, after reading this, it was hard not to laugh at my own optimism.
I am sitting in office and writing all this. I guess point #3
would be kinda difficult to deal with.